Murder dropped 11.6% from 2022 to 2023, the largest single-year decline in the last 20 years. Property crime was also down overall, while motor vehicle theft and shoplifting rose.
Okay, folks, listen, listen, it’s, it’s very simple, okay? People are talking, they’re saying, ‘Mr. Trump, the murder rate, it’s too low, it’s not what it used to be.’ And you know what? I agree. We used to have, back in the day — oh, the 70s, maybe the 80s, beautiful times, really tremendous times — we had so much, so much happening, people, and now… now, it’s just… nothing! Boring! What happened? Where did the murders go? I don’t know. Nobody knows. But when I’m elected, folks, let me tell you, we’re gonna bring them back. Big time.
Now, now, people say, ‘Oh, Mr. Trump, why do you want more murders?’ And let me tell you something: it’s about jobs, okay? People don’t think about that. Murders? They need investigation. Cops? Gotta hire more cops. Jobs! Economy! It’s all connected, folks. Big brain stuff. Nobody thinks like me. And, and the murderers, some of them, very fine people, they need work too. They’re out of work. We’re gonna put 'em back in business, folks. You’ll see.
So vote for me, we’re gonna do some, some tremendous things. More murders, more greatness, everyone wins. Except the people who get, uh, you know, but that’s okay, that’s okay. It’ll be, um, it’ll be something.
So when you go to vote, remember: a vote for me is a vote for… well, let’s just say you’ll want to lock your doors. But it’ll be huge.
Okay, folks, listen, listen, it’s, it’s very simple, okay? People are talking, they’re saying, ‘Mr. Trump, the murder rate, it’s too low, it’s not what it used to be.’ And you know what? I agree. We used to have, back in the day — oh, the 70s, maybe the 80s, beautiful times, really tremendous times — we had so much, so much happening, people, and now… now, it’s just… nothing! Boring! What happened? Where did the murders go? I don’t know. Nobody knows. But when I’m elected, folks, let me tell you, we’re gonna bring them back. Big time.
Now, now, people say, ‘Oh, Mr. Trump, why do you want more murders?’ And let me tell you something: it’s about jobs, okay? People don’t think about that. Murders? They need investigation. Cops? Gotta hire more cops. Jobs! Economy! It’s all connected, folks. Big brain stuff. Nobody thinks like me. And, and the murderers, some of them, very fine people, they need work too. They’re out of work. We’re gonna put 'em back in business, folks. You’ll see.
So vote for me, we’re gonna do some, some tremendous things. More murders, more greatness, everyone wins. Except the people who get, uh, you know, but that’s okay, that’s okay. It’ll be, um, it’ll be something.
So when you go to vote, remember: a vote for me is a vote for… well, let’s just say you’ll want to lock your doors. But it’ll be huge.
Thank you, good night, and God bless hamburgers!
6/10, points lost because I was still able to follow the thread
There should have been something about crowd sizes, electrocution vs. sharks, and how windmills cause cancer…
Yeah they didn’t do “the weave” but that’s okay most of us lack the brain power to do so