I know this is probably a shitposting meme. And my wife and my female friend, when I asked them, both laughed and said, “Yeah all the time.” I can’t tell if it’s sarcasm.

I asked this because Im a guy, and we’ve heard it all before. The guy plowing a warm apple pie. The ookie cookie BS. The jerk off with a sock. Dudes have done some weird things. I absolutely have found myself relieving some stress in interesting ways.

But veggies: Is this a common thing? Am I going to have to worry that my daughter, when she reaches a curious age, starts exploring with vegetables?

During puberty, should I start giving my children Amazon gift cards or no questions ask money to protect my produce?

I am aware this question is ridiculous and I am prepared to be ridiculed.

  • pete_the_cat@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    I’m a dude and a cucumber definitely doesn’t seem like it would feel great going in and out. It’s bumpy and the skin is pretty coarse. A banana definitely sounds like a more logical choice.

    • IronKrill@lemmy.ca
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      3 months ago

      Nah, you haven’t lived until you’ve experienced the girth and texture of a garden cucumber.