I just run

cat /dev/urandom | strings | head -10

Until I find something that slaps.

Told the granddads to choose a name as is Korean tradition.

We got a list of the most popular baby names a year before they were born and just picked one that we liked. Their middle names come from my wife’s home country.

My girlfriend and I agreed easily for a girl’s name, but couldn’t agree on a boy’s name.

Eventually (like months into the pregnancy), by talking, one name came out and we both loved it.

We knew the names we liked, and waited for the surprise. It was a boy :)

For first names we separately compiled lists of names that we liked from whatever sources we could find (Internet lists, books, media l names used in media, etc). We went through each other’s lists and vetoed names that were a hard no. Then we wrote the names out on a sheet of paper in random order in a playoff bracket style arrangement. Each pair had a winner until there was only one.

For middle names, it had to be something that flowed well with the first name. It also had to be able to convey that special sense of “you done fucked up” and disappointment when said with the first name (while emphasizing the second), like “John PAUL”. Finally, candidates were from (mostly deceased) family members.

Names and initials were checked to minimize bullying potential; if we could think of a way to abuse it the name or combination was rejected. For example, Karen would be a no due to current slang usage. Or if the initials would spell ASS.

First you have to pick something you like, like some sort of hobby to draw on for inspiration. Like say you like motorcycles, you might want to name your child Harley. But people would tease them if you just named your child the same name as a motorcycle, so you need to modify it into something cool like Hurley. Now you have a name that means something to you, and you know your child won’t be teased.

We had a couple important criteria for the names we chose. First, it should be pretty easy to yell in case you need to call them, and second is that it’s hard to turn into an insult.

We added the second after a friend named their boy Hurley. Poor guy.

Last name is single syllable so the first had to be 2 or more. Made a big list of names I liked the sound of and people I admire and let my wife decide from that. Would have been happy with any of them. We didn’t know the sex yet so we picked both a male and female name.

The middle name is Tiberius after James Tiberius Kirk from Star Trek.

Get one of the books with baby name suggestions. Weed out all of the names of annoying uncles and aunts, childhood bullies etc. Let your partner do the same. Then get rid of all of the names that rhyme with something silly so they won’t be bullied in school for their name. Then argue about the few remaining names and pick one or a few. Sleep a few nights, then take a long, hot/steamy shower and commit to it.

(You can doodle around in the book, circle a few names and add a few or your favorite movie characters.)

Spent ages making lists and whittling it down.

Then yeeted the list 30mins after the birth and picked a name we never discussed, mentioned, no family history, or knew anyone with.

In general I look for receipts or random pieces of paper I find on the side of the curb on a rainy day. But that’s just me.

I saw him and immediately knew his name was either “Simon” or “get off the fucking counter”

In Dutch, the word for “child” is “kind”. There’s an app called Kinder in which you swipe baby names until you match.

Me and the wife each separately looked through lists of names on those sites, then we compared notes on ones we liked. This lead to our shortlist. Over the course of a few weeks we managed to narrow it down untill we had a name we both liked with the advantage of having said it out loud many times… so it was good.

Alphabetically. Aardvark is doing great. His younger brother is really good at math.