Semi-Hemi-Demigod

This is your reminder that national polling doesn’t matter, and that you can win the presidency with roughly 20,000 votes

Like what happened to that dude from Metallica’s “One”

Yeah. There’s always a chance that a customer could have an issue on a weekend and then I’ve gotta fix it. Once I was on 27 hours of conference calls over a weekend. But as I’ve gotten better at my job those sorts of things happen less and less.

Honestly the worst part of my job is doing my timesheets and updating weekly status, but when the weather’s good I do that from my hammock with a cold beer in hand which makes it suck less.

I’m salaried so I don’t have a lunch break. I work from home so I basically set my own hours as long as I can be contacted from about 10am to 3pm and go to any meetings I have scheduled.

John Oliver showed me they’ll probably just call in a vet.

Maybe get some farmer with castration bands.

I remember when iTunes was called SoundJam MP and that was much nicer than iTunes. I still miss its eclipse visualizer.

Which was when Slashdot was like BBS before the Eternal September

I’m less concerned with them being effective and more concerned they’ll fuck up and kick off Kessler Syndrome

Hopefully this works out better than the time they made iTunes for Windows

I don’t have any resources but my Volvo has a long, low hood and a heavily padded engine cover

We can’t have pop-up headlights because of pedestrian safety, but you can buy a 5,000 pound vehicle that does 0-60 in three seconds and has a hood level with most people’s heads because that’s totally safe for pedestrians.

Nah, you’re not worth it.

Real smart of you to change what we’re talking about in the reply. That’s a classic move to make yourself seem like you made a point.

Fascist regimes don’t last long because they all eventually turn their violence inward. They breed the sort of mistrust and lack of questioning that don’t make them effective societies.

Seeing as most of the country isn’t right-wing

Are you talking population or land area? Because only one of those matters and it’s not population.

For a moment Rodney King’s beating changed everyting, too.

The USA is a racist country. It was founded on racism, built with racism, and now thrives on racism. That’s never gonna change, and it deserves to perish in fire.

There’s no need to create division between me and the Democrats. There’s already plenty of it. I hate that I have to vote for them but we have a shitty system written by racist slaveholders so here we are.

Never trust someone from York County.

I would like to primary him. Not because I think I’d win - I definitely wouldn’t - but because I want to ask him what the fuck happened to him. Like, dude, you used to be cool.

Except we primary him and we either lose and get blamed for when he loses, or watch our progressive challenger lose because the rest of the country hates him.

America isn’t nearly as progressive as us Internet weirdos think it is.