My dad has recently been caught having an affair with his young personal assistant. Huge scandal; mom was very angry. Now they’re in the middle of divorce proceedings. Mom moved out, the other woman moved in and I chose to stay with him because we’re super close; he’s like my best friend. Now mom’s telling me to go and live with her and go no contact with him cause he’s a bad person and by continuing having a relationship with him I’m condoning his actions and “ignoring her suffering”. My relationship with my dad hasn’t changed, I don’t see why I should end it.
There are no ‘sides’.
Maybe not in a perfect world. But here there are clearly very opposing sides.
Even if the dad is cool about it and makes it seem like choosing to stay with him isn’t picking a side, it still is
My recommendation is not to side with the guy who not only had an affair but invited Ms side peice to live in their old family home
Between an immoral piece of sh and a person who was dedicated and believed they weren’t yes there are sides.
Father isn’t just committing an act of betrayal, which he does to the person he loves, so op will definitely also be fair game for betrayal, father is also abusing his seat of power over his very young employee which is called coertion or quid pro quo and is UNACCEPTABLE. The fact OP could look into the eyes of a man who would betray him without a second thought is just cope.
Eventually it will sink in how horrific this was and op I am sure being moral themselves hopefully will take moms side.
Normal to go through a period of shock or denial before it sinks in.