We’re pretty pissed off at ourselves right now too. I’m sorry things got this far and wish I could offer more than fear and frustration…

I’m disappointed in the Passover story for omitting God’s 11th plague: bombing the shit out of the Egyptians. I’m even more upset about them taking this quote out of context:

You shall not oppress a stranger, since you yourselves know the feelings of a stranger, for you also were strangers in the land of Egypt.

It should actually end with “Unless you have lots of explosives and military equipment being supplied to you. In that case, you should probably terrorize a vibrant and colorful population into becoming radicalized by your abuses and then genocide those people because loony politicians believe that they can personally kick-start the rapture.”

Thanks for pointing that out! Yeah, I totally mistook “they” to mean the board, not the suspended members. To the suspended members, I say “finally. Thank fuck.” The best time to stop a genocide is before it starts, but the second best time is right fucking now.

Here, in case your downvoting finger is getting a little itchy, you can tell me to fuck right off on this comment

[Senator Tommy Tuberville, Republican of Alabama] made racist comments in response, lamenting New York City’s high concentration of undocumented immigrants and referring to them as vermin who “live off the federal government.”

And then he snatched some cheese from a nearby reporter before scurrying off to his hole that he chewed into the wall. Later, while fucking his rat wife, he called Muslims “rat fuckers,” apparently as a condemnation of someone other than himself.

after publicly criticising Israel’s military assault on Gaza, an act they described as incompatible with Jewish values and morally indefensible

Fuck off, don’t tell me what my values are. This is the kind of shit that made me question and then abandon my religion. It’s obviously impossible to abandon being ethnically Jewish, but this bullshit has been so goddamn atrocious that it makes me question my people’s history.

Jewish values my ass. Israel is run by terrorists and the Zionists in my family welcome it with open arms. Fuck all these monsters.

Edit: ohhhhhhh… Apparently “they” are the heroes of this story who got suspended. I thought that “they” were the board that suspended those folks. Well, fuck me for losing the subject-pronoun-antecedent game. The sentiment remains, but directed towards the fucking bastards who suspended the originators of the quote that I misattributed.

Everybody’s saying it. And even if they weren’t, I believed it before they said it!

But they’ll be rich for a moment and get to look down on the poor!

“Stop it Ron, stop”

Yee-haw!

More like the “Fart Toot Caca,” amirite???
* Hold for nonexistent applause *

They probably asked chat-gpt if they should add AI to Barbie and were told, “That’s a great idea! You’re right that such an important high-selling product would be improved by letting children talk directly to it.”

Also, can’t wait to jailbreak my Barbie and install llama2-uncensored on it so that it can call Ken a deadbeat shithead.

You hear that? Netanyahu is woke. We gotta drop this DEI regime!

Alternative take: Netanyahu has the balls and courtesy to flatten entire families instead of just the men. How chivalrous.

Fuck…

Could you imagine getting fired by your AI CEO because it hallucinated your name into an AI-generated post mortem of a crash caused by AI-generated code

Trying to force the singularity, I see

patting himself on the back diaper

His rash has gotta be so hot and angry by now that his ass cheeks glow in the dark

It’s wildly offensive and arguably shouldn’t have been made. But occasionally, there’s something funny in it.

Thanks for warning us before you pull the trigger. I may not have voted for any of you fuckers, but I’ll be damned if you didn’t warn us about all the ways you were gonna ruin our lives before the morons around me voted for you.

I sure am glad Beto O’Rourke didn’t win. Sure, I got plenty of access to firearms whether in my house or at the multiple gun stores down the street—and, sure, I’ve never considered owning an AR-15, but I don’t wanna protect children as much as I want bat-shit crazy neighbor to have the freedom to own 3: two of which he welded together.

My freedom keeps my belly full and warms my bed at night.

Edit: I got angry and went on a loony tangent of a rant. Sorry.