Capt. Wolf

Picked it up the other night and streamed it. Basically, I recommend it if you’re a Rocky Horror fan. If you’re not, you’re getting a somewhat mediocre and extremely short $10 platformer.

The good… It was super funny. On top of the obvious show story, there’s a whole mess of references to 8bit games that hit just right. I had to stop and take a break a couple times because I was laughing so hard. The music is great, but instrument choices are a little too “farty” sounding in my opinion. Still enjoyed it, sang along and said callbacks during cutscenes.

The bad stuff…

Some of the deaths are kinda cheap. There’s platforms that will collapse that have no indication of such. The only way to find out is when they fall. Likewise, most of the hazards in the game are spiky balls and weights that swing or fall to kill you. There’s moments where stuff falls from off screen. Only way to find them is when they’re coming down to smash you.

There are only 3 regular enemies throughout the game, a screaming skull, a brain with googly eyes, and a zombie/skeleton maid thing. In my opinion, they could have thrown in Transylvanians, dogs, could have even justified mutants or something and called them failed experiments.

There’s only like 3 levels, visited by each character. Each run through the level gets harder with slight pathing variations. Also, Brad is the only character who takes more than one hit. Janet and Dr. Scott are instant death. Doesn’t impact things a ton because in their levels, as getting hit would probably be instant death anyway.

I feel like they really missed the opportunity to include a church level. Instead the game starts off in the car on your way to the castle. Could have had skeletons and zombies in the graveyard, ended the level with either Pastor Tim Curry fighting you because he was pissed about you writing in the church doors. Could have even called him an asshole. Also, perfect opportunity to do an American Gothic Riffraff/Torgo cross reference.

Lastly, boss fights are super random, but ultimately the same. They have a jump and an attack. They’ll randomly do either one. No patterning, so getting hits can be erratic. I only got hung up on the last one.

Ultimately, $10 was cheaper than going to buy a ticket. The game only takes around an hour to complete. I ran through it twice and still found it enjoyable. Whether that seems worth it is up to you. Normally, I’d have been a little annoyed at the play time and there’s obvious flaws, but I still enjoyed it a lot because of the theme. It’s an established story. They respected the content and didn’t go nuts and try to deviate from it. Having grown up with LJN’s travesties, I enjoyed this. Get it if you like the show.

I have done my duty as a citizen.

Ironically not a movie about democracy…

Didn’t you ever play with a kid who always cried “NO FAIR!” any time he lost something? That’s, like, half our country right now…

Free and fair for them, not for you…

This is how democracy dies, not with a bang, not with a whimper, but a “cha-ching!”

That’s all a sign of just how sick our society is. We can treat mental health, we can offer higher quality education, by doing so, we give a person the opportunity to elevate their socioeconomic status. These are largely key factors in criminal behavior. But instead we just lock up the criminal, because it’s cheaper. We can’t fix our society until the government stops prioritizing profit over health and education.

You ever see a dude buy a sports car during a midlife crisis? That shit’s his baby for years. I’ve got a neighbor who’s been waxing his Miata for decades… Keeps it under a tarp and never drives it.

Jail? I have more of a feeling Trump will be taking a page from Putin or Lukashenko. We’re gonna find her in a ditch, having committed suicide by shooting herself in the back like 7 times or she’s gonna accidentally fall out of a window.

Or maybe you’re right, and she’ll just get Epsteined in jail… He’s got enough nazi friends in there.

Yes, please, add assault to his list of crimes! Preferably on camera, in front of plenty of witnesses, and unprovoked so he has zero chance of talking his way out of it!

He’s pulling the “Look at me! I’m a working class guy just like you! I really do care about you!” angle. Like the propaganda of Mussolini working in the wheat fields.

First McDonald’s, now this…

I guess he’s trying to scout out possible jobs for after he gets out of prison.

No offense to actual food service or disposal workers. Trump would be shit at either.

To wit:

Just fucking do it, or do you agree with him that your island is a floating pile of trash?

These idiots are so terrified that if Trump takes power, their heads will be on the chopping block for standing up to him… Grow a pair already and do what’s right for the country! No more of this “Stop or I’ll say stop again” bullshit.

You know… Part of me would totally believe that nobody even vetted him before booking or even asked to review the show he was going to do the night of the rally. Especially with the knowledge that some moron on his team booked the Four Seasons years ago without realizing that it was a landscaping company.

The rest of me knows these people are all pieces of shit and don’t care.

Self-righteously arguing with people about how their conscience is clean because they’re choosing to do nothing instead of engaging in our political system in a manner that could actually bring about change.

Next they’ll start lining them up to shame them…

🎶Are there any queers in the theatre tonight?

Get 'em up against the wall

Now there’s one in the spotlight, he don’t look right to me

Get him up against the wall

And that one looks Jewish and that one’s a coon

Who let all this riff-raff into the room?

There’s one smoking a joint and another with spots

If I had my way I’d have all of ya shot!🎶

I’m absolutely shocked that the guy who skipped out on paying his employees’ severance pay, the rent for his facilities and office spaces, and various vendors and other companies is also not paying out the bribe money he offered people… Shocked I tell you… Who could have possibly forseen this?

Too true, the cult of personality is real.

Sooooo buying votes, got it…

FBI? This guy over here…

Also, I have about as much faith in him paying this as his former Twitter staff.

It sure should, but as long as both primary parties support Israel, your argument is invalid. Israel is going to continue their war, whether we like or not, and both the democratic and republican parties will continue to support Israel despite public dissent. While that’s definitely an issue for public concern, and we should absolutely continue to voice our concern and pressure our officials, it’s essentially a non-issue for this election.

Stein still remains a spoiler only to the democrats and, at the bare minimum, a taciturn supporter of a republican fascist…