“Please don’t be offended if I get an erection during this scene.”

“Also, please don’t be offended if I don’t.”

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Push the white button to make it start in Black mode.

Or they did, and the lawyer says, “I won’t risk my license putting my name on that horseshit. If this is really how you want to proceed, you’ll have to do it yourself.”

Which translates to, “I consulted with an attorney who suggested I send you this demand letter.”

The first time, it’s an accident. The second time, it’s a tradition.

Is this, by any chance, about Rosa DeLauro representing Connecticut’s third congressional district?

Apparently ‘Shylock’ and ‘shyster’ are etymologically unrelated. Shylock is a Jewish moneylender from Shakespeare, and not a particularly pleasant fellow. Shyster is from the Germanic word for shit, and also used to describe a disreputable person of any race or religion.

Some affiliate marketer running A/B/C/D analytics on a fake review site. Maybe one of the sites gets better SEO rankings, or a higher click-through rate on the payload. The data will be duly noted and applied to the optimization of future reviews and review blogs.

None of the “reviewers” reviewed anything, or was ever in the same room as any of the products “tested”. No effort was made to provide value to you, the reader. Everything on those pages is committed to a single purpose: defrauding Google into defrauding their user base with bad search results. Probably LLM co-authored too, but I’ve seen similar things before the recent AI boom.

Marketers will destroy anything of value if allowed. This is why we can’t have nice things.

Some do, and inter-library loans are a thing.

I now see that the body part in the penultimate image is an eyelid. The first one still looks like pink fuzzy penises to me. What do you think it is?

So don’t poop in the kitchen sink. Got it!

I would have understood Michaelmas as the feast day of Saint Michael. My studies of hagiography are too limited to say which day that is or why he got sainted. Nor did I know that British people used (maybe still use) that term to refer to an entire season.

Probably spoofed, but that doesn’t necessarily make it meaningless. If you convert numbers to letters per the telephone code, and treat 1 as a space or similar punctuation. It might resolve to KISH NORM. Is that phrase meaningful to you? Do you know anyone who would spoof a callerid to send you that message?

Because it’s called HIPAA, not HIPPA. The second P is the one that stands for privacy.

Fifty years ago, doctors would protect their patients by accidentally losing certain files if they didn’t think the authorities had a good reason for seeing them. Under HIPAA, they’re required to keep and maintain good records in case the government subpoenas them.

Occasionally, maybe once per paragraph, misspell a word intensionally. Your family, knowing how carefully you used to profread your own writing, will notice this as abnormal behavior. Either you captors have already damaged your menial health or you are trying to conceal a message. Gards reading you letters before posting them may be more used to bad writing among their detaines and not suspect anything deeper. Your family might reply using the same code, both acknowledging receipt of your coded message, and perhaps including a key for a more secure one.

That’s an invaluable lesson.

There’s no technical reason why you couldn’t. It’s probably just some stupid marketing reason like:

• A. Monster doesn’t want to sell its concentrate this way.
• B. They do, but not at a price that would justify including it as an option among other common self serve beverages.
• C. Stores don’t want to offer unlimited access to dangerously high levels of caffeine after a Panera customer with a pre-existing heart condition drank about a gallon of caffeinated lemonade and then dropped dead in the dining room.

I don’t like them. They tend to be inaccurate for anything that contains information, such as might benefit from reading more than once, or pondered over before understanding. And if it’s meaningless, then why would I even care if I get interrupted midway through it?

I think you can get away with just about anything, so long as it doesn’t piss off anyone with a bigger navy than you own.

Interior design suppliers let you place orders like “6 feet of purple books.”