I have a low tolerance for repetitive work, am an accountant and my “career” has basically been two startups. There are places that just keep changing, changing systems and processes all the time. I don’t have to do things the same way every time, I keep trying new ways, and nobody feels stepped on if you suggest a better way of doing their job.
I would say look for the culture - when you walk in here there are people talking, people cussing, getting up to get water or to go for a walk to clear their head. We can walk into the president’s office and make a suggestion (or email or teams them), and people do also transfer between jobs here, it’s encouraged.
What I will say the tradeoff is though - chaotic places like this always require more hours at least some of the time. They are more flexible with you but also require some flexibility from you. For me that choice is a no brainier, I am useless in a more regimented job. But it doesn’t suit everyone.
I think no, because you plan a real apology with restitution and have a plan to do better and are actually doing better. If you have to try to be “good” and are, I would argue you are a better person than someone who doesn’t have to try.
Think of it as your character arc. You started out bad and are improving. If you aren’t good yet, you will be. Keep practicing.
Long after I learned to read. At which point it was just confusing since so many words can’t be ‘sounded out’.
I learned to read alongside learning to speak, learned it like a language, not like a code, I didn’t really sound things out consciously, it went in the other direction, I recognized words. So by 3 years I could read quite well, and did come by that path to an understanding that the individual letters had sounds.
Like if you’ve ever seen a little kid learning to write, they start with just scribbles then lines of scribbles then clumps of “letters” then actual words with letters. That is sort of the process I had - books held stories, then I saw there was writing, then my mom read the stories while pointing to the words, then I pretended I could read by memorizing the book, but then just jumped to being able to read. Anything. Like first book was “bears on wheels” but second book was Grendel, and I could read the newspaper, literally think I could understand written language more than spoken.
So anyway - yes was taught phonics but not taught to read with phonics.
I did this through high school by listening in class, the teachers explained the material then assigned homework, which I did not do, then tests, which I crushed with near 100% accuracy, then got a C grade in most classes because I don’t do the work, only the tests. Also tested out of the first year of college. Was just good at taking tests I guess.
In university though - I did have to study and do the homework to ace the exams. That was more specialized (accounting).
ETA: your friend sounds like an absolute testing savant. I don’t know how that will translate to a job though.
Yeah these guys are radicalized extremists.
You can’t tell if someone is “legally” in the U.S. by looking at them. You can’t tell if someone was born here by looking at them. You would think racism would be separate from the immigration panic because there is no way to tie looks to immigration status, but instead the logic is thrown out the window.
My friend told me once “when a guys life goes to shit he looks for someone to blame.”. These particular guys have blamed some nebulous idea of “illegal immigrants” instead of women, or communists or whatever.
And through nursing.
On the highways here, the original speed limit of 55 was to save our nation’s resources, not just “55 to stay alive” but also it was an efficient speed to maintain and still pretty fast.
Inside the city it works much better to make drivers feel unsafe going fast. Narrower lanes, speed bumps, roundabouts, etc.
In answer to your actual question - some laws are just old and haven’t been unwound yet and others are used as pretext for profiling, police (or, more properly whoever is running them) like to be able to stop people for no reason but that can be seen as illegitimate, so they keep laws that everyone breaks, jaywalking, etc to have an excuse.
I don’t think there is any one law everybody breaks really but also no person who has lived perfectly law abiding life.
I’m old enough to have lived through several recessions, though I was poor for the first couple of them. I think a recession more likely than a collapse. If it’s a recession:
If you can keep your job you will be ok, really. Try to keep your job if you can. Yes even if they do temporary pay cuts.
If you’ve been unable to buy a house, a recession may make it possible. That is how we got our first house - prices tanked, we got a run down house, couldn’t improve it really but it was a place to live for a long time, and when you buy in a crash, taxes stay low here.
Remember there have been worse times and you are descended mostly from people who survived them.
Be nice to people. Always be nice on your way up, because what comes up must come down. We used to have to dumpster dive, and I have lived on the streets and in a car, don’t want to again, at all, but there are plenty of less extreme tactics - live with more people in one house, we used to have one family in each bedroom, not one person, and that makes housing cost so much easier.
#1 is really the most important though - if you can keep a job you will be ok. If that falls through, do not think you are on your own, reach out to others and work together.
Sure, but happy satisfied people aren’t usually the ones who progress humanity forward in art or sport. I wouldn’t describe it as neurodivergence, but do think it’s the people who have a need that most of us don’t.
I don’t really think so, unless you have a very broad definition of neurodivergence. In which case, yeah sure most all art is made by people who are not balanced happy individuals, now too. If you don’t have that black hole of need inside you, you don’t need to fill it.
HG Wells
Jules Verne
Mary Shelley
L Frank Baum
Heinlein
They seem like regular minded people just brilliant. I don’t think of anyone as a “normie” though, my definition of normal is either it has to be broad enough to encompass a majority of the population, or it’s meaningless because nobody is identical to anyone else, all broken in our own way and strong in our own way.
I can’t think of a best moment, though I’ve had a life that has gotten better over time, lots of good & great moments, none stands out as best.
Which leaves the worst moment, so I guess as an individual point it made a bigger impact.
I do schedule my wellness visits when leaving my wellness visits so yes, a year in advance. Just in case, and so that I will do it. But can get in for urgent care if needed, same or next day. And stuff like prescriptions they can often do online without an appointment if it’s an ongoing one. About a month wait for non urgent specialist care, sometimes two-three (that is often because I refuse to travel to outlying areas though, so wait for a local appointment)
And I do NOT live in any sort of medical desert. Lots of doctors offices here, probably more than most similar size cities. Several hospitals, a medical college, so many doctors.
It’s not worse than I remember it being in the 90s, I remember 6 months wait for dermatologist, months for pediatric orthopedic (there is an orthopedic urgent care though, which has saved us from going to emergency at least ten times) . I remember thinking back then that people who said “but in Canada they have to wait for care” were idiots, we wait here too!
Honestly one of the things I’m grateful for, is having had both rich family and very poor family. The thing about actually rich people is they don’t care, in my experience they are pretty gracious as long as you are relaxed. Dress to the absolute minimum of what is required (I’ve gotten away with $20 dresses and good shoes and nobody batted an eye.)
If you can keep the clothes, get stuff you like, negotiate for a spa day, get your hair done, keep the style very, very simple and outshine them all! You can do it!
Or you could decline the invite, if you aren’t interested in a fancy dress ball.
Slide the seat back some, dude!
Some thoughts: In a dry place, humectants can work the opposite way, pulling moisture from your skin or hair out into the air, or from deeper layers of your skin out to the surface so you may need something more occlusive; and when my skin is feeling sensitive, mechanical exfoliating (,like your loofa) always makes it worse, but chemical exfoliation (like a toner with glycolic acid) usually no problem.
La Roche Posay Triple Repair (the drugstore version) is really good and not too pricey, it’s like it both sinks in and leaves a slight protective layer; and the Ciclaplast if you need immediate help with healing. If you are very sensitized and everything is bothering you you can also try just putting a very thin layer of coconut oil all over you while you are still a little damp after shower, assuming you aren’t allergic.
The sunscreen IUNIK Centella Calming Sunscreen is good too, not irritating and very effective as a sunscreen.
I hate dry air so much. Live in a humid sea level place and occasionally have to travel to dry altitude and it’s so shocking, my nose bleeds even. Hopefully you can get your skin calmed down and get ahead of it.
Still not enough that I’m willing to get chickens. And probably still not as much as the real cost including currently externalized pollution costs. About $8 for the good ones. Around $5 for the factory farmed ones, but they are often sold out, the supply right now isn’t meeting the demand.
No, quite honestly I do want to live an enviable life AND would be so happy if everyone else did too. I do not want other people to literally want my life, no. I want them to be too happy with their own lives to care about mine.
This makes sense, but I don’t think you need to change your feelings. Your actions are what affect the people outside of you, they don’t know what you are thinking, and you already recognize it’s not reasonable.
I remember when I went back to work after a few years raising my kids. It was odd to work with men, after only being close with the one man. But over time, it got normal and I am friends with some of them still, platonic friends. So some of it is literally just practice. Keep practicing. You sound pretty self aware, I think you will be ok.